My mommy board had a discussion about some obvious signs that you're the mommy of a toddler. Here are the highlights, most of which I can already relate to:You sing the Wiggles songs in your head and get so excited when they come on tha you dance around the room with your child..."en salada de fruta fresca".
You wear high heels while blow drying your hair because your child wants you to wear them.
You only eat at restaurants that offer crayons with their placemats.
You don't ask your husband if the mail came anymore, now its "did the monkey-mail come, did the monkey-mail come...?"
Your child's favorite accessory is one or more appendages covered in markers or pen.
You get your hair pulled and a kiss within 30 seconds.
You carry wet ones in your purse!
You pull your wallet out of your purse and Cheerios come out too!
When you find yourself saying, "uh oh" at work or in adult situations.
You're used as a tissue and don't realize it until you go out and there's a big snot stain on your pants.
You read yourself a children's book out loud to prove to a 17 month old that you are not paying attention to their tantrum.
When you are trying to have a business meeting and your child is in the house w/ you and you look over and say, "Excuse me for a sec, but my daughter has big girl panties around her neck and I need to get them off" to a guy who is childless and embarrassed.
Sudden silence makes you worry.
You have to explain that a tampon is NOT a chew toy!!! Now, please put it back in mommy's purse!
You get out your checkbook at the store and can't find a pen but you do have a yellow crayon.
You eat stale puffs (or Cheerios, or dried fruit) out of the high chair crevices and don't even think twice about it!
You have four purses in the car and only one belongs to you!
You're followed around by someone constantly closing every door or cabinet you've opened before you're ready.
You always have someone watching you use the bathroom.
You go to the grocery store to get band-aids and hydrogen peroxide and you explain to the cashier that you need the items because your husband has a "boo-boo".
Your idea of a shower consists of wiping baby wipes over your body!
You don't think twice about having a paci or sippy in your purse at any given time, even when your child isn't with you.
You honk your car horn to amuse your child and another driver takes offense.
You turn your child over in the middle of a parking lot and smell his/her butt to see if she has poops.
The backseat of your car looks like a cross between Toys R Us and the library.
You find toothpaste in the cabinet with your pots and pans, and the next day find it in your hamper.
You have to hold an item while the cashier scans it because you don't want her to have to touch the drool your child left all over said item after chewing on it.
When you let your child help push the cart at the grocery store, even though it takes twice as long and you always seem to be in someone's way.
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